On African Soil

Catch Up

Yes, we've been and returned and we didn't blog while we were there. There's quite a few reasons for our lack of blog entries. The list includes lack of Internet connections, lack of time, lack of energy, among others but we are back now and we've had a few days to rest which we needed after of six hour time change and handling the twins for two glorious weeks.

But now it's time to catch up with you all and we apologize for waiting until now. We know you are all waiting for photos, answers, and information but it simply wasn't within our ability to do it until now. We've decided instead of a delayed day by day blog or just one massive entry we're going to blog the major events regardless of the days.

Arrival

We left DFW on the 5th  at 6:30 and flew to Atlanta for a 9:45 arrival. Then on an air plane to Amsterdam, Netherlands leaving at 10:10pm and arriving at 1:05pm on Sunday. That looks like a 13 hour flight but it is actually only 8 hours and 30 minutes because we had to give up 5 hours of time. We had a 3 hour lay over in Schipol but it turns out you have to queue up again and go through security to board and our three hours disappeared rapidly in the queue. Let's start by saying we love KLM. They kept feeding us through the flight and the wine is complimentary. Say no more, it is KLM for us from now on. The last leg took us from Amsterdam at 3:15 pm to Accra's Kotoka airport, arriving at 8:00pm. That's 20.5 hours of travelling!

Kotoka was busy and small. It has a single baggage claim that serves all flights and it was very crowded at the time. We managed to grab our bags and then began looking for Percy, our guide. And we continued looking and finally we texted our agency only to find that our guide thought we were arriving on Monday night and was not at the airport. We really only wanted a comfortable bed and hot shower at the time but we took the news of this extra delay in stride and waited for his arrival.

We did eventually find him after a very quick customs check and we were on our way. As we rode in the cab, a tri-colored Peugot, Percy informed us that the president,John Atta Mills, had died a few weeks earlier and that this week, the week of our adoption court date, was the week they were holding his state funeral on Thursday and Friday. Although Percy wasn't 100% sure, it was most likely the the courts would shut down on Thursday and we would have to try to reschedule the court date the following week.

Our reaction:
Blink... Blink...... Blink, look at each other ... Blink. (repeat several times)

 

The Mascot

As such Accra was full of people attending the funeral, hotel accommodations weren't so easy to get. Oh and did we mention we weren't expected until tomorrow, as in "right now you have no hotel to stay in". Whoopsie! We were due at the Swan hotel in a few days, but as of that moment we had no bed. Fortunately, Percy was on it and got us a room in the Mascot hotel. Where is it? I'm not entirely sure since it was dark but truthfully that wouldn't have mattered in the least if it was high noon because we made about 100 turns getting there, over down a hill, and there it was. I do know it is in North Kaneshie and by then we were happy to have it.

How was it? Well it was a bed. A big one that was very firm, like a hay bale. There was hot water, sort of, once we figured out how to turn on the on-demand hot water heater, but we couldn't shower because the hose to the shower head leaked and there was no pressure. And we couldn't bathe because there was no way to plug the tub. So as much as we wanted a hot shower or bath, especially Jena, it wasn't going to happen. Internet was out of the question. This is where we would stay for two nights until we transferred to Cape Coast and our first night with the twins would be here as well.

We did have electricity though it didn't make it to all the lights such as the bed side light. But clever engineering had the foresight to rig us a way to turn the overhead light out from the bed. It was a long wire with a rocker switch taped to the ceiling and then down the wall to directly above our beds. A little investigation determined why the bed side lamp didn't work:

That's a tangle of the phone and lamp cord behind the bed side table which ended in no plug but bare wires instead. I'm thinking even Tom Bodett couldn't have left the light on for us here.

We awoke on Monday excited because we were going directly to see the kids. Hot showers didn't matter now, it was twin time. We just wanted a good cup of joe to get us started and we were ready to go meet out children. Said coffee arrived, a pot of hot water and Nescafe instant coffee packets. You know, it really didn't matter, nothing could shake us then it was...after all twin time.

Tema

The twins were staying with their foster family in Tema which is east of Accra. We piled into the taxi (as our driver wasn't on shift until the night we arrived at the airport which, of course, wasn't until that night, or so he thought) and headed to Tema. Here's quick map for you. This time we hit an express way and went most of the way on it until the very end. This is truly one of those scenes you see with people selling things on the street from a BIG bowl balanced on their head. Mostly gals, and they are talented. They can run to keep up with the car and make change at the same time without dropping the bowl. They carry everything on their heads, propane tanks, peanuts, roasted pig, bags of water, fruit, we even saw one with wooden skooters for the kids balanced up their, about a dozen of them. This is quite typical:

The streets are narrow with the open sewers on both sides which serves as a utility trash can, sewage gutter, and urinal, all at once. Don't worry this was not unexpected that is simply how it is done. You do have to be carefully getting out of the car and make sure you have your bearings before you take that first step.

We suddenly pulled over on one of these very busy narrow streets and Percy announced, "This is it.". We hopped the gutter and followed him to a gate which we opened and there was Noah, our very first glimpse. He was in his little red toy car pushing himself along. It took Jena about 0.01 seconds to reach for him and 0.05 they were both smiling. Nala came out of the house with her foster mom seconds later and we got busy taking pictures and kissing kids.

 

Jena meets her son for the very first time.

Mama doesn't let him stay in his car more than a fraction of a second before she scoops him up.

And seconds later she knows what it feels like to be a mom, times two.

Little Nala with her dad.

Noah goes a little Hollywood demonstrating his readiness for America.

We stayed for about four hours and Naomi, their foster mother, cooked us an amazing vegetable and rice lunch which we ate with the kids. Wow was it good! It was the first time we ate substantially in Africa and it was one of the best meals we received the whole two weeks. As the afternoon started passing Percy asked us if we wanted to take the kids back with us. There was nothing to discuss, we piled into the cab and headed back to the Mascot arriving shortly before dark.

 

Our First Night

Once there Percy stayed around a bit to answer a few phone calls and tell us about the plan for tomorrow. He got us set up with breakfast and left. While he was there Noah invented a new game, called "Suitcase Slide". He played it about fifteen minutes with mama increasingly becoming concerned about his bottom. Noah Yow don't care.

Then we played on the bed for a little bit. This was a wooden giraffe puzzle we received as a gift. It had ten pieces that easily fit together to make a giraffe. They had a great time with them throughout our stay.

 

When supper came along we whipped out our fancy organic food like peaches but it was baby food and these two set the standard right away that they don't eat baby food. With the kitchen closed (and scary anyway) we went to another plan, snack food to tide them over until breakfast. Mama got feeding duties and they loved it. We would soon start to understand their relationship with food. We learned the universal word "Ma" which means "more", "Mom", "Dad", "I want that", "pick me up", "get that over there", "take me there" and many other things all clarified with a pointing finger.

Then at last it was lights out for all of us because though we enjoyed out first day together all four of us were tired. We had one bed, a big one, and they got the right side as we took the left. Even on day one we found that they like to be in contact with one another when they first lay in bed.

Asleep but in contact with each other.

Our first site of them was love. We saw them smile and giggle and laugh. We got to watch Jena change her first ever diaper (we'll try to upload that one but little Nala might not like her naked little self on YouTube when she's eighteen - but we have it and we're happy to show it more private - it's worth it).

Noah is much larger then Nala but many people determine they're twins because of their faces. They are cute and loving and we had a wonderful time with them. It was just the beginning of a whole life together.

Visas, You Can't Leave Home without Them

As things often do, our process to get visas for Ghana took a turn for the worse. We sent off last week for the 72-hour expedited visa service and they arrived in Washington DC on Monday morning. When you send it in, you include a self-addressed return FedEx envelope so they can send it back to you. We've been watching the tracking number all week.... and things were looking grim.  By Thursday, we realized we weren't going to get our visas, but more importantly we wouldn't be getting back our passports either as they must be sent in as part of the visa process. No one was answering the phone at the embassy and we knew they are closed on Fridays.

It looked like we could get a visa in Ghana if we could just get passports, so Friday morning we headed down to the Dallas passport office to get replacements. Complications arose and after three hours we found out that you can't leave the US without a valid visa from Ghana. Fortunately, other attempts were underway.

Friday, as we were in line at the passport office, things began to look up.  Our agency has a courier in DC, and she going to the Ghanian Embassy to see if she could turn things around.  Then it took a call to someone in the Houston Ghanian consulate to work with the DC one to get this taken care of, acting on our behalf. As of Friday at 4pm we didn't have visas, but because we had some very dedicated and compassionate people in Austin, Houston, and DC we received word that our visas were in the mail. A call to our local US post office where they were arriving and a conversation with a very special and sweet postal worker to watch for our package, and we were travel-ready Saturday by 9:30.

We did receive a new photo of the kids with Percy, our guide and facilitator in Ghana. He is a wonderful person that is working very hard to help all of Ghana's children. He started a not-for-profit called Africana Child. A quote from him:

Africana Child "Seeks to enhance the quality of life for sick, abused or neglected children. These children burdened by circumstances outside their control, often live in the most sterile and uninviting environment. By providing their basic needs, we create an enriching and happy atmosphere to encourage their emotional and physical healing and well being".

Percy holding our very precious Nala and Noah

We've been hard at work packing a huge pile of donations for the orphanage, food and clothes for the twins, medicines, gifts, toys, books, and games into backpacks, bags, suitcases, and even pockets! Here's a picture of what we will take:

4 Suitcases, a backpack, a duffel bag, a diaper bag, and a snack bag

Boy does Jena pack heavy! Actually, the largest three are stuff with donations to the orphanage including cloths, toys, games, and books. The backpack is full of things we don't want to be separated with like camera, medications, Steripen, etc. Of all these bags, the smallest -- the black duffel -- has both of our clothes in it. Talk about packing light. Believe me, it took Jena's superhero alter-ego to get her clothes to fit into that bag!  And she's only taking 2 pairs of shoes!

We are so excited that we will meet them on the 7th for the very first time. The next few weeks will be something we remember forever.

Thank you all so much for your prayers, blessings and well-wishes.  We hope to keep you posted during our trip. Thanks to all that helped make this happen!

The Baby Shower

My dear friend, Kim Kemble, hosted a wonderful baby shower for us last Saturday.  My closest friends and family were there, and it was so wonderful to see everyone.  Karen Saunders came all the way from San Antonio, and Kären Siwek all the way from Fort Collins!

I want to apologize for not getting out my thank you cards before our trip to Ghana! It's been a crazy week, and as much as I tried, there was just no time to get them done.  So, I will save that for the (20+ hour) plane ride.  

I was overwhelmed with the generous gifts, but most of all I enjoyed having all of us together for such an awesome reason. Thank you all so much!  And, Kim, and extra thank you for making it such a special day!

Here are a few pictures from the day.

Kim and a few elves helped her make these AWESOME decorations!!  Click to see the details, but they're amazing - safari and African themes.

Kelsey, me and Jana

Donna and Kim

Reading a very special card...surrounded by tons of gifts for Nala and Noah.  Oh, and of course little Dash - he was helping me unwrap the present.

Sweet Lori - what a great smile!

Ms. Sara - another great smile!  Stephanie off to her right.

Another great smile from Kelsey!

Hollee, Karen, and Stephanie!

Dad made a guest appearance!

Dad with 2 little monkeys - one for Noah and one for Nala.

Flying Frogs

Court Date

The brave frogs are flying. That's right, we received our court date.  It's on Thursday, Aug. 9th. We are due in Accra on the 7th to MEET the twins. This means we have to leave on the 5th. We go to Atlanta, then Amsterdam, and finally Accra arriving late the night of the 6th. On the 7th we will finally get to meet the children. This trip is to adopt them and on the 9th they will legally be our children to shower with love. Jena will be a mommy in only 10 days. We do not, however, get to bring them back. They still have to be naturalized by the USCIS and that means another 4-6 weeks before we can go back and get them. Even so, we can't wait to hold their little bodies and kiss their little cheeks.

Foster Home

They have moved to a foster home, and yesterday we received some new photos and new medical reports. The foster family lives in Accra and one of them is a nurse so we are very happy to have her available for them. We aren't sure whether this is a family or a foster home that has other children yet.


Here's the foster home family:

We are very grateful for their help in taking care of Nala and Noah. They've been with the family for about a week now and they've taken them both to the hospital and had complete blood work done for them. We are thrilled to have such wonderful people watching over Noah and Nala.

Photos

We received new photos! They are the cutest little twins we have to say without ANY bias at all. Okay, maybe a little.

Here they are socializing in the laps of their care takers. Noah is out growing Nala now. Hard to see here, but her socks say "Heart Breaker" and we know she is. We are thrilled to receive a picture of them together.

Noah is all dressed up and ready to party. We envision that paper to be a one-way plane ticket to Texas...for two.

Look at those eyes! Something surprised Nala maybe it was that little red light on the camera. She's still struggling to fit into her clothes.

Fast and Furious

Though we had all the big stuff taken care of like immunizations and shopping, we didn't envision we'd have only 11 days to prepare. We're zipping around getting everything ready like two little chipmunks getting our winter hibernation nest ready. I'm pretty sure, in fact, I saw Jena's cheeks stuffed with nuts just the other day.

Just to give you an idea, we are packing light for ourselves so we can take as much to the orphanage as we can. We're allowed to take a suitcase and we want to stuff it to the gills with donations to the Royal Seed Needy Home and any where else we can find that needs them. If you live in the area let us know, we'll pack as many clothes, games, toys, and books as they'll allow us to carry. If you're not in the area, we'll be going back and you have time to send us whatever you may choose. Ghana does prefer "new" over "old" because they want the children to have something new when possible, but we'll take anything you might want to send us.

So, we have to get visas, electrical gear to handle the 220V to 120V step down, a water sterilization system (UV Steripen), a medical kit, toys, books, and games for our kids, a picture book of family members to leave for them, and many other items split on two big "TO-DO" lists. 

Whew, we'd write more but we have to get going!!!

Questions...Answers

Questions ... Answers

How much?

There are a few questions we get asked a lot. The first is relatively simple. It goes something like this, "Hey, is it expensive to adopt overseas?"

Not surprisingly the answer is yes, but in a more general sense the answer is, "Yes it's expensive to adopt." All things being equal it costs about as much to deliver a baby in the hospital as it does to adopt one domestically except insurance will help you with medical costs, but not with adoptive costs.  International adoption is more expensive because you have to pay for travel and for naturalization of your child here in the States.

The good news is there is about a $12,000 tax break for each adoption and while that won't pay for it all, it certainly helps. This is after you've adopted though, not during the process, so you need the money up front to handle the expenses that will come.

Why Africa?

By far the biggest question we get is, "Why not adopt an American child?" We do feel that is a fair question and to us there is a very easy answer, orphan children don't have nations, they are simply children. But there are more tangible reasons for our choice as well.

Yes, America has orphans, of course. In 2008 the Children’s Bureau of the Administration for Children and Families of the United States Department of Health and Human Service reported that the number of children awaiting adoption in America was about 123,000. More recent data shows about 408,000 children in foster care in America but in general about 51% of those children are there temporarily and will be reunited with their families (source), another 11% were emancipated, leaving 155,000 as a rough estimate. That certainly is a lot of children. Keep in mind that is America's orphans, most domestic adoptions are of newborn babies from the time of birth and these are not "orphans." That does beg the question, how many does Africa have?

In 2001, UNICEF produced a report entitled Africa's Orphaned Generations. This report estimates about about 34 million orphans were in sub-Sahara Africa (that is is all but 7 African countries - mostly those along the Mediterranean Sea). In 2010 this number has risen to 43 million according to the World Bank. That means that the total number of orphans in Sub-Saharan Africa is greater than the total number of children in Denmark, Ireland, Norway, Canada and Sweden. Of these children, 30% lost parents to the AIDS epidemic. An estimated 12% of all children in Sub-Saharan Africa are orphans.  Of those children, 5.7 million were orphaned in 2010 alone. 

43,000,000

If you started counting now, and said two numbers every second it would take you over 248 days to reach that number. If you carefully read that report you'll see that UNICEF counts a child that has lost either parent as an orphan along with those that have lost both. This may seem strange but they do this because it is nearly impossible to raise a child on a single income in Africa and a lot of these children live alone during the day, or are in the streets while their parent is away. However, if you insist on the requiring both parents to be gone then it is estimated to be only 15% of this number, leaving 6,450,000 million.

6,450,000

To count that out at two numbers per second it would take only 38 days. So lets just concentrate on the 6.4 million orphans.

Africa takes care of it's children to the best of their ability. Orphaned children stay in the family as much as possible being raised by aunts, uncles, grandparents, or their family connections and even friends where possible. It is very difficult to count the number of orphans that are in orphanages because many orphanages are ad hoc anyway, being just someone's home that is taking in children.  But, various surveys in various countries have shown there to be at least 2,614,000 children in orphanages in sub-Saharan Africa (see the citations at the bottom).

Many people envision orphanages to be like old hospitals with white walls of peeling paint, but that's not even close. What does it mean to be an orphan in Africa? It often means living in very poor conditions often on dirt floors, sleeping on straw mats on the floor. It means eating the same foods (wheat, rice, corn, beans) once a day since those are the foods donated. It means living without electricity as a lot of Africa does, taking a shower only when it rains, or a bath consisting of one squeeze of a sponge while standing in a bucket. Everything is done together at the same time with the group: eat, sleep, use the bathroom.  With so many orphans and so little money, the caregiver to child ratio is often 1 caregiver for 15 to 60 (yes, sixty) children. As a baby, it might mean drinking from a bottle propped against the side of the crib you are sharing with four others, and having days go by where no one holds you. This is hard cold reality brought on, not by lack of caring, but by poverty. With confidence it can be said that if you live in America and have not seen third world poverty first hand, you have no idea what it's like.


We say, "I'm starving! I need to get something to eat." 


This is not hungry, this is starving:

This is home:

This is the playground:

This is the restroom:

This is alone:

This is just wanting to be held with love:

Orphaned children in America will get an education. Only 17% of African orphans manage to even attend primary school because they or their community have no money. At the age of 16 they are released into a world with few jobs, while they possess no skills, no education, and are in poor health. If they are girls they will most likely marry to survive, if they can even do that, and it will be all they ever have regardless of whether it's good or bad. Many will have no family, no home, and no place to go but it is still time for them to leave. One thing they will rarely do is eat.

Any child without parents is very sad, our hearts go out to them all, but there is a very good chance that kids in the American foster system will have a decent life where their basic needs are met by working for a living when they reach adulthood. They most likely feel love from their foster parents. African children in orphanages have such a slim chance of ever achieving even a somewhat normal life, and instead will spend their days living off what they can find, sleeping where they can, and never having an idea of what it means to be healthy. There are exceptions but there are so very few. There is simply no where for them to go. 

Africa is working very hard to change this as most countries are switching to a foster system and shutting down orphanages. But with so many children orphaned it is very hard, and the world still seems to want to fund orphanages but not fosters. In short, Americans and Europeans are not helping, we should fund the families and try to keep the children with their families in the first place instead of orphanages. Or better yet fund programs to solve the root problems such as AIDS programs, birth control, and education so that Africa can learn to help itself (as they so very much want to).

We feel that we are the lucky ones. We have been fortunate to have the opportunity to bring two beautiful children into our family. They will get an education. They will eat every single day until they feel full, several times. And above all they will have a mom and a dad, an older sister and brother, grandparents, aunts and uncles, and even cousins. They will have a family and friends who love them and want them to have opportunities, too.

If  you and I don't adopt them, who will? 

That is why Africa.

Sources:

• "Africa – Africa Region Human Development Working Paper Series". Worldbank.org. 21 October 2004. Retrieved 26 July 2011.
• "Ministry of Gender and Family Promotion – MINISTER’S VISIT TO HOPE AND HOMES FOR CHILDREN (HHC)". Migeprof.gov.rw. Retrieved 15 July 2012.
• "Table Of Contents". Synergyaids.com. Retrieved 25 July 2012.
• "Press centre – Millions of orphans in Nigeria need care and access to basic services". UNICEF. Retrieved 17 October 2011.
•  http://mmorphanage.org
•  http://report.kff.org/archive/aids/2000/09/kh000911.4.htm
•  "Unicef Togo Statistics".
• ^http://www.crin.org/docs/Mapping%20of%20Residential%20Care%20Institutions%20in%20Sierra%20LEone.docx
• "Unicef Sierra Leona Statistics".
• "Unicef Senegal Statistics".
• "Thokomala". Thokomala. Retrieved 26 July 2012
• http://whereamiwearing.com/2012/02/02/africa-does-not-need-more-orphanages/

Preparing Their Room

We are painting the twins' room with the great help of their sister, Kelsey, and Auntie Jana. We are amazed by their creativity and talent.  With the theme of the African Savannah, Kelsey has sketched an Acacia tree, a giraffe, and an elephant so far.  We projected the images of her sketches on the walls using an overhead projector.  Jana and Kelsey traced her sketches, and Jana is making them come to life through her painting.

Once the supervisors showed up, we began to work.

Representing the dog's point of view:  Tuffy Huff

From the cat world:  Fada and Pabu

We started first with the Acacia tree.  Here is a picture of a real Acacia tree.

Here is Kelsey's sketch.

An amazing sketch...very scientific and detailed.

So far, Jana has painted the trunk of the tree...leaves are coming.  Remarkable!

We love the balance of the tree!  It's hard for you to see the scale of it...it's very large.

Then, along came a giraffe.

Kelsey's sketch.

Amazing!!

Jana and Tuffy started painting the giraffe...

You can see how large the paintings are in this photo.

Jana hasn't finished her yet, but after many hours, she (the giraffe) has come to life!

Our giraffe from head to hoof.

What a sweet face!

The elephant is next...

Here is Kelsey's sketch.  We can't wait to see it come to life, too.

Again, what an amazing piece of art!

Why Brave Frog?

On our first trip to Caddo Lake we were sitting on the dock at Moonglow lodge. It was Jena's first trip, we were well over the bump to realizing we were not just falling in love with each other, but that we were already in love. We sat on the dock with a glass of wine and watched the sun go down with Jena taking some amazing pictures. As we talked night fell around us leaving us with the sounds of the wetlands. The frogs were chirping all around us in a chorus of noises, high, low, short, and long. Suddenly in the distance we hear a boat and it pulls tight into the dock to our right. All the frogs stopped and we sat in silence as the man docked his boat, got out, and left the area to go home. A few minutes after he left we were still waiting in silence. I leaned over to her and whispered, "We need one brave frog" because we knew as soon as one started they all would. Of course, soon one little frog let out one little peep, then another,  then one more, and soon we were surrounded by the harmony of hundreds of frog noises.

"Brave Frog" is our way of saying, "It takes just one brave individual to start something that can make a difference." It's a concept of appealing more on your sense of adventure then your sense of fear regarding the unknown. Don't let thoughts of failure hold you back, but instead realize that in the grand scheme of things everything will work out okay if you are willing to work hard and keep an open mind when achieving your goals.

So we're brave frogs. We invite you to join in the chorus.